miserable romantic

i am miserable. there are no words to describe the way im feeling. i cant eat. i cant sleep. i cant cry. even though i want to.

i felt great last night. i was dressed up just like a flapper. with my red fringed dress, red lipstick, and black cateyes. i was on my way to a banquet for choir. it was amazing. friends, a nice hotel, a nice meal. i even got an award for most unique personality. haha. things were perfect. well not completely, but it was nice.

we all headed out to the dancefloor, not the best playlist of music. but it wouldnt matter if i complained or not. i tried to get the dj to play justice, and the pipettes. no such luck. haha but it was fun. all these people wanted to dance with me. alot said i danced better than the black girls there. haha things were great.

then, bohemian rhapsody came on. goodness it was hilarious. until some idiot jumped and stepped right on the instep of my foot. it was terrible. today it is swollen and in an ace bandage, probably no school tomorrow.

then things got worse. me and my friend were texting. coincidentally i have a crush on her. i wanted to tell her, and i did tell her. but now i feel that its going to be awkward around us. hmm. i cried. she said she thought it was cute. she actually thought it was cool. and she was proud of me for telling her. aww how sweet.

which led me to this morning, listening to beirut on repeat. ive listened to every song at least 4 times. im just tearing up. i drew the picture to the above right (click to make it larger) in about 20 minutes. it felt good to draw. i havent drawn like that in a while. i guess i needed inspiration. so inspite of my girlcrush, i dedicate this picture to her. and every beirut song in existance.

влюбленность и везение, teddy